It happens every now and again. A moment of immense clarity. Almost spiritual in its occurrence. So it was the other night that it occurred to me very vividly that you have to believe in your own truth. Above and beyond anything else, you have to believe in your own work ethic and performance standards. There will always be naysayers and doubters. People who overvalue their worth and therefore, by necessity, need to undervalue yours.
I was again watching "The Godfather", this time with special commentary from director Frances Ford Coppola. Hard to believe, but the studio fought him on everything in the making of the film and he says that it was probably the most unpleasant experience of his professional life. They didn't want him to cast Marlon Brando. They didn't want him to cast Al Pacino. Instead the studio wanted either Danny Thomas or Ernest Borgnine in the Vito Corleone role. The studio hated his choice for musical orchestration. They second guessed him on practically every major and minor decision. They even had studio people on the set looking over his shoulder at every single turn. He feared he was going to be fired at any given moment. The head of Paramount Pictures famously said "Marlon Brando will never be in this movie!" And the list goes on.
Yet "The Godfather" turned out to be one of the best movies of all time. It's in exceptional company with "Citizen Kane" and "Casablanca" as the best 3 movies ever. What if Frances Ford Coppola had not stuck to his guns and fought for what he believed to be the vision of the movie and Mario Puzo's book? Could Danny Thomas or Ernest Borgnine really have bought the depth and nuance that Marlon Brando brought to the role? Who but Al Pacino could have really given that performance as Michael Corleone?
As I watched and listened to Coppola's commentary, I was struck that a man who is regarded as one of the best movie makers of all time, had to fight this hard for his voice to be heard. I tried to parallel his story to my life. Are there ways in which I stifle my own creative energy? Do I believe in myself and my truth as loudly as I need to? Can I begin to articulate who I really am and what is important to me more clearly? Because at the end of the day, holding on to what you value to be true for you is the ultimate act of self expression and self love.
