Some life lessons can be excruciatingly harsh and painful yet simultaneously sweet and life altering--once you open yourself up to the enormous potentiality of limitation. All this danced in my head late this morning as I watched the amazing Derek Beres lead us through an indescribable exotic blend of asanas, all part of the brand new EQ Yoga class Flow Play. So many lessons can be learned in observation and here I was on this day only able to observe. In my direction line of vision--3 vision of pure beauty, elegance and grace on the yoga mat.
The class unfolded in perfect unison and for a few minutes it struck me that I am constantly surrounded by such pure Beauty. Although I could not join them today, my mind wrapped itself around every exquisite move of their bodies. Drinking it all in. For a second or two, I thought about my own current limitation. But then it struck me, fully for perhaps the first time, how utterly powerful and beautiful and serene and perfect is movement in all its forms. Why haven't I ever really stopped and appreciated all the wonder of movement before?
Because I was always trying to get on to the next thing. Trying to be a better version of myself. Faster. Stronger. Smarter. Thinner. In the process, missing out on this one essential thing. They say that when you don't listen, the Universe will find a way to make you listen. And so here I was on Monday morning September 16th. Listening.
This week, I've been cleared to start doing 15 minutes of light cardio. This for the girl who could run for hours. Looking at the dynamic energy and pure bliss of everyone around me, I was also struck by another essential truth. The same beauty in movement that I was so awed at by looking at everyone before me, I had never really taken a moment to celebrate that beauty in myself.
Indeed it is all about the Flow. The Flow of Energy. The flow of creativity. The flow of love. But also about the Flow of Gratitude. And so in this moment I accept that it's pointless to try to get back to where I was before or who I was before. Maybe physically I will not be that person again. But I am going to soak up the things that I can do NOW. And for the 15 minutes of light cardio that I get to do on the Elliptical, I am going to go with the Flow.
The Universe has it's own distinct rhythm. Learning to be still long enough to listen and honor that rhythm is a lesson I continue to learn off the yoga mat.
Monday, September 16, 2013
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 30: Saturday, 12/17/11
One of the greatest feelings in the world is the feeling you get upon completion of Something. Anything. So I am beyond thrilled to have completed today the Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge. My personal goal was to do a class daily for 30 consecutive days and write a daily blog about the journey. And so on the 30th Day, I have completed 31 Bikram Yoga classes. One more than needed. I can't help myself for doing one more class than needed. Always the overachiever.
The main purpose of my daily blog has been to document the process, more for my benefit than anyone else's. It has been a surprising fringe benefit that so many of you have found inspiration in my daily words. I am forever grateful and profoundly humbled that you have chosen to share this journey with me.
As I mentioned on Day 1, I first did the 30 Day Challenge in 2004 so this is not my first go around. I wish I had documented in diary form that first Challenge because it would make for interesting comparisons. To say that this has been a challenge is to vastly underestimate the time commitment involved. But whatever sacrifices I have made to fit a daily Yoga practice and daily blog in, and they were many, have paled in comparison to all that this daily practice has given me.
The timing could not have been more perfect as we finish off 2011 and gear up for the New Year. In yesterday's class, the amazing instructor Kathryn, spoke about her favorite entertainer Michael Jackson. She vividly described one of MJ's concert rituals: A ritual I had never given much thought to. At the end of every concert, he would go center stage and throw his arms wide open...a symbolic gesture to let his fans know that his heart was wide open to them and that he was openly giving all his heart and love to the audience and in turn accepting and receiving all the love that was being sent back to him. She asked the class in the next posture which was Full Locust Pose/Poorna-Salabhasana to lift our arms up and open our hearts up in the same way that Michael Jackson used to. It was such a beautiful and enlightening moment that I almost wanted to cry. Because 30 days of Yoga has really opened my heart in every way. To all of you. To all of life. To all of the possibilities of a life connected to self and self reflection and a commitment to what is my ultimate life's purpose.
The questions I have received about my 30 Day journey have largely been limited to questions about the physical benefits of the practice. You will notice if you have been reading my daily blog that I've spent very little time talking about that because that has not really been the point of this Challenge. I will say, however, that physically I have made vast improvements in how I execute the postures. My posture is definitely more upright and many of my super tight areas have started to open up. I have a physically demanding job that requires me to execute repetitive movements all day and week. So YES, the Yoga has been great for my body. It's been a year where all that I do to my body has taken it's toll, so ending the year taking care of myself in a better way feels great!
It also just occurs to me as I'm writing this. Every year at this time, I always feel a profound sense of loss and pain. It was around this time in December of 2003 that my Mother entered the ICU for what would be her final few weeks. The Holidays are definitely not a favorite time of year for me. I didn't really fully understand this until now, but The Challenge came at exactly the right time. More importantly, as I write this, I'm having a major AHA moment as I realize the real reason for this Challenge.
Yoga is a productive way for me to grieve. It was my Mother's death in January of 2004 that led me to a Bikram Yoga practice and my first 30 Day Challenge. So it seems comforting, especially right now, to reconnect with my practice. They say everything has a time and a season. A beginning, a middle and an end. All that is now will cease to be. There really is only one "Now." 30 Days of Yoga has really taught me to appreciate the now and live in the moment. But it's also given me a place to acknowledge the grief and the loss and the pain.
The definition of Yoga that speaks the most to me is "Union". Union of Mind. Union of Body. Union of Spirit. In these 30 Days, I have found the perfect union. It has been many things. At times impossibly difficult and overwhelming and at times supremely satisfying and rewarding and most times it has been all those things simultaneously. Yin and Yang in perfect balance. It would not have been a Challenge without it. And I would not have wanted it to be any other way.
Namaste...
The main purpose of my daily blog has been to document the process, more for my benefit than anyone else's. It has been a surprising fringe benefit that so many of you have found inspiration in my daily words. I am forever grateful and profoundly humbled that you have chosen to share this journey with me.
As I mentioned on Day 1, I first did the 30 Day Challenge in 2004 so this is not my first go around. I wish I had documented in diary form that first Challenge because it would make for interesting comparisons. To say that this has been a challenge is to vastly underestimate the time commitment involved. But whatever sacrifices I have made to fit a daily Yoga practice and daily blog in, and they were many, have paled in comparison to all that this daily practice has given me.
The timing could not have been more perfect as we finish off 2011 and gear up for the New Year. In yesterday's class, the amazing instructor Kathryn, spoke about her favorite entertainer Michael Jackson. She vividly described one of MJ's concert rituals: A ritual I had never given much thought to. At the end of every concert, he would go center stage and throw his arms wide open...a symbolic gesture to let his fans know that his heart was wide open to them and that he was openly giving all his heart and love to the audience and in turn accepting and receiving all the love that was being sent back to him. She asked the class in the next posture which was Full Locust Pose/Poorna-Salabhasana to lift our arms up and open our hearts up in the same way that Michael Jackson used to. It was such a beautiful and enlightening moment that I almost wanted to cry. Because 30 days of Yoga has really opened my heart in every way. To all of you. To all of life. To all of the possibilities of a life connected to self and self reflection and a commitment to what is my ultimate life's purpose.
The questions I have received about my 30 Day journey have largely been limited to questions about the physical benefits of the practice. You will notice if you have been reading my daily blog that I've spent very little time talking about that because that has not really been the point of this Challenge. I will say, however, that physically I have made vast improvements in how I execute the postures. My posture is definitely more upright and many of my super tight areas have started to open up. I have a physically demanding job that requires me to execute repetitive movements all day and week. So YES, the Yoga has been great for my body. It's been a year where all that I do to my body has taken it's toll, so ending the year taking care of myself in a better way feels great!
It also just occurs to me as I'm writing this. Every year at this time, I always feel a profound sense of loss and pain. It was around this time in December of 2003 that my Mother entered the ICU for what would be her final few weeks. The Holidays are definitely not a favorite time of year for me. I didn't really fully understand this until now, but The Challenge came at exactly the right time. More importantly, as I write this, I'm having a major AHA moment as I realize the real reason for this Challenge.
Yoga is a productive way for me to grieve. It was my Mother's death in January of 2004 that led me to a Bikram Yoga practice and my first 30 Day Challenge. So it seems comforting, especially right now, to reconnect with my practice. They say everything has a time and a season. A beginning, a middle and an end. All that is now will cease to be. There really is only one "Now." 30 Days of Yoga has really taught me to appreciate the now and live in the moment. But it's also given me a place to acknowledge the grief and the loss and the pain.
The definition of Yoga that speaks the most to me is "Union". Union of Mind. Union of Body. Union of Spirit. In these 30 Days, I have found the perfect union. It has been many things. At times impossibly difficult and overwhelming and at times supremely satisfying and rewarding and most times it has been all those things simultaneously. Yin and Yang in perfect balance. It would not have been a Challenge without it. And I would not have wanted it to be any other way.
Namaste...
Friday, December 16, 2011
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 29: Friday, 12/16/11
So I must fully disclose that I have a secret! And here it is. Today on Day 29 I am on my way to my 30th class. YES! I have done 30 Bikram Yoga classes in 29 days. A few weeks ago, I did two classes in one day and therefore will officially be done with the 30 Day Challenge. And so TODAY my name will go up on the Bikram board as having completed the Challenge. YAY!!! I get a few more goodies for completing the Challenge but will explain all that in tomorrow's blog.
Even though I am done as of today, I will still do a Day 30 tomorrow because my actual personal Challenge was to do a class a day for 30 days. Which means tomorrow will be my last day on my 31st class. Feeling really good y'all...
Even though I am done as of today, I will still do a Day 30 tomorrow because my actual personal Challenge was to do a class a day for 30 days. Which means tomorrow will be my last day on my 31st class. Feeling really good y'all...
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 28: Thursday, 12/15/11
Day 28 of daily yoga done. After last night's inferno of a class (I swear that room was way hotter than 105 degrees), tonight we were back to some level of civility. It really was amazing for me tonight just to see how far I have progressed in the 4 weeks. I'm feeling GREAT about myself. Setting a goal and being this close to actualizing it is very exciting!!! Day 29...Here I Come!
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 27: Wednesday, 12/14/11
Finally home at the midnight hour. Fresh from what will hopefully be my last 9:45pm Bikram Yoga class...ever! Another long day but got it done. The room was hotter than hell tonight. The last class of the evening is generally like a furnace. I was so happy to get done tonight. Let's just say the 90 minutes felt like 90 minutes. When 11:15pm finally dragged around, it felt soooo good. Again, I'm feeling so great having made it into the studio tonight and putting my time in. Always feeling better for just doing it. Always feeling better at the end of class than at the beginning.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 26: Tuesday, 12/13/11
On the 26th Day, it occurs to me that I have achieved what I set out to do with this Challenge. I have felt such a level of calmness in my practice and in my life. In the first few weeks of the Challenge, I was more observational about the practice and the Yoga. Now, I practice from an internal place that has very little to do with who else is in the room or even the instructor.
I am now able to just go to class and let the experience happen. It is so much easier to be in that space. The path of least resistance if you will. Of course, some of this is the joy that happens as you get closer to achieving a goal. I am thankful on this day that it feels so good to be nearing the home stretch.
Most of it, I think, is what happens when you make something a good habit. It becomes instinct. Part of who you have trained yourself to become. The execution becomes easier because you have done the work to build a solid foundation.
I am now able to just go to class and let the experience happen. It is so much easier to be in that space. The path of least resistance if you will. Of course, some of this is the joy that happens as you get closer to achieving a goal. I am thankful on this day that it feels so good to be nearing the home stretch.
Most of it, I think, is what happens when you make something a good habit. It becomes instinct. Part of who you have trained yourself to become. The execution becomes easier because you have done the work to build a solid foundation.
Monday, December 12, 2011
Bikram Yoga 30 Day Challenge--Day 25: Monday, 12/12/11
The closer you get to finishing something...anything...the more exciting it gets. And so on Day 25, I'm am enjoying where I am but looking forward to this Saturday. Day 30.
When I first started this Challenge, I wasn't quite sure how I was going to be able to fit in all this Yoga into a super busy schedule. But the truth of the matter really is that we have the ability to make the things happen that we choose to. I have scores of amazing moms in my classes who balance kids, husband, and a job but manage to make themselves and their workouts a priority.
We can do anything that we put our minds to!
When I first started this Challenge, I wasn't quite sure how I was going to be able to fit in all this Yoga into a super busy schedule. But the truth of the matter really is that we have the ability to make the things happen that we choose to. I have scores of amazing moms in my classes who balance kids, husband, and a job but manage to make themselves and their workouts a priority.
We can do anything that we put our minds to!
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